back under the knife

Hello! I know I haven't posted in a reeeally long time. Usually "no news is good news," but not the case for me. I'm going back in on Friday for a revision.

I posted a picture for reference, since it's very subtle to most people (except me, of course!). The only way I can really describe it is that my belly button looks like a small crater and my sides aren't "even." My right side has a nice curve and the left side does not.

So on Friday my plastic surgeon will "cut around" my belly button and make it smaller (or something...?!) and do a little more lipo contouring on the left side.

The nice part, it's all free! The bummer, of course, is that I have to go through another surgery. My surgeon has assured me, however, that it will be a walk in the park compared to my tummy tuck. I am holding him to that!

Hopefully I'll have some photos to share in a few weeks. :-)

more "hand" news than "tummy" news

It's been a while since I've posted here. Mainly because I don't have a whole lot to report! Things seem to be somewhat "stable," although I am still swollen. So I'm not getting any better, but not getting worse. But only being 3 months in, I still have at least 3-6 more months until the swelling will be gone.

The fact that I've gained a few pounds hasn't helped any, I'm sure. But, it's the holidays, right? My New Year's resolution is to start exercising again! I think I am finally ready. I know it'll be hard and I'll be sore, but I'm really not doing myself any favors by being a couch potato.

A few people have asked me recently about my arthritis condition, so I figured I'd take this opportunity to share an update about that as well. (To get anyone up to speed who needs it, in May of 2010, I started getting this mysterious hand pain at night. I've had it ever since, without a definitive diagnosis.) If you are only interested in my tummy tuck news, no need to read further. :-)


Last February my rheumatologist put me on an RA medication to see if it would help my hand pain. Unfortunately it's one of those drugs that you have to take for 6 months before it actually helps (if it's even going to help at all). Within 1 month of taking it, my inflammation markers (blood tests) were almost at normal! This was a HUGE positive indication that the medication was working. I was very optimistic that after 6 months, my pain would be gone.

Well, 6 months came and went...still had the hand pain. Decided I would just give it some more time, so I sort of "forgot" to make a follow-up appointment with my rheumatologist. Unfortunately when I needed to contact her prior to my tummy tuck regarding the medications I was on, she was like "Hey, you need to get in here!"

In October I went back to see her, and told her I was still having the pain in my hands, but that I was still really hopeful it would help. So she said I could stay on it 2 more months, giving me 10 months on the medication. Well, sad to say, I still have the hand pain.

So last week I was given the news that, basically, the medication wasn't going to work -- and that it also would not make sense to try any other RA drugs since this one didn't help. Not as bad as a death sentence or anything, but being back to square one is really depressing. Basically I'm being told that I have to live with it.

We did the blood tests again, just to have a baseline before I went off the drug. My tests came back NORMAL!!! Still on the high end of normal, but I went from having a CRP of 36 (normal is 7 or lower!) to a 6! So why didn't the medication help the pain? Frustrating.

2013, here we come...

where has the time gone?

Today was my 8-week post-op appointment! I'm technically at 8 weeks on Wednesday, but who's keeping track, really? It's amazing how fast time flies sometimes!

Now that most of the pain and swelling have gone down, I've been a bit overly critical of my tummy. I keep thinking, "I spent HOW MUCH money on this and my belly isn't PERFECT!? WTH!!" I've been a bit concerned about this "lopsidedness" that I see. My husband says it's just that I'm more swollen on one side (which is true) but I really felt like I was more "tilted" and not quite so curvy on my left side.

So I brought it up with my plastic surgeon today, and he definitely saw the same thing as me. He however looked at me from behind (which I never really think to do) and he said that I have a slight curvature in my spine that is making me naturally "tilt" that way. So I guess I felt a little better after that.  He did also say I am still more swollen on my left side, and that it WILL get better over time.

Don't get me wrong—perfection is not something I am expecting! It's just such a noticeable difference to me that it's left me a bit bummed. But it's just one of those things that I really can't "officially" complain about until ALL the swelling is gone...which won't happen for many more months.

I was also told today that when I hit 12 weeks (the "magic number" apparently) I can resume all normal exercise and activities! I seriously want to hit the gym. I've had this great excuse to be lazy for the past 8 weeks and it's not done me much good. I am only down 3.5 pounds from my surgery date. Considering that they took 5-6 pounds OFF, that means I have GAINED WEIGHT since my surgery. Not good!!! I'm sure all the salted caramel chocolates and Halloween candy I've been eating are mostly to blame.

My next appointment isn't until February 11, so not sure I'll be posting much on my blog until then. However, in a few weeks I will be going swimming for the first time since my surgery! Maybe I'll post a picture of me in my bathing suit. That'll be exciting. 

Speaking of pictures...My blog post with my before/after photos is now up to 615 views. Seriously, stop looking people! There's nothing more to see here! LOL! Just kidding. Look all you want. It is a remarkable difference. 

no news is good news

I haven't posted in a while because 1) I haven't had a doctor appointment since October 20, and 2) things really haven't changed much! No news is good news, right?

I did finally ditch the compression garment. It was so hard! Even now I still have this urge to put it on, and I haven't worn it for a week.

It seems like the swelling is NEVER going to go down. By the end of each day I feel like I'm going to explode. I wish I could live in my jammies. My clothes fit great, but with all the swelling I am so uncomfortable in them. It's hard to accept that this swelling is going to take 6-9 months to go away. I am so done with it!

My scar is healing very nicely (although my belly button still looks awful). I started using a scar treatment called bioCorneum. It's the first (and only) FDA-approved silicone scar treatment—so of course it's ridiculously expensive and can only be dispensed by a physician. But surprisingly I noticed a HUGE difference the first week I used it. My scar went from raised and bumpy to flat and smooth in just a week. I haven't noticed any more noticeable differences this past week, but still very impressed in what it did in the first week.

One other little tidbit of info I will share... I just looked at the stats of my page views of this blog. Most run about 50 to 70 page views. My "I'm so excited" post—the one with my before and after pics—has a whopping 466 views! 

Seriously people—look at the pictures ONCE and move on! I guess now I know what people were really interested in...so I guess I'll need to post more "after" photos soon. (I'm still holding out on the worst of my "before" pictures...)

avoid the debbie downers

So I freely confess that I stole this...but it was too great not to share.

We all know one…the Debbie Downers, the buzz kill. And most of us will have to deal with a few after surgery. It is really hard when you feel that you don’t have the support from your loved ones. 

The choice to have a mommy makeover is strictly yours and hopefully you are doing this for you and only you. I have had a few family members of mine that I surprisingly haven’t received support from. It is hurtful, especially since they saw me struggle with my weight and self-esteem issues for years. 

A lot of people will see it as a “waste of money.” I started feeling the need to explain my reasoning for having the surgery. I wanted them to know that it was not out of vanity, or selfishness. But remember the old saying, “Those convinced against their will, are of the same opinion still.” It really doesn’t matter. As much as I wanted them to hear me out and understand my reasoning, they won’t. 

If they love you, they will keep their negative comments to themselves and support you no matter what. But you may have those who love you, yet still feel the need to give their opinion even when not asked. My response to those people would be a nod and a smile. (Believe me, I know it’s hard.) 

If you want, throw in a “please keep your negative comments to yourself” or a “if you don’t have anything nice to say…”. But my advice is to steer clear of the “screw you” sort of comment. It is just not worth it. As long as you know why you are doing this, that is all you need. 

For me, being able to look in the mirror, smile and for the first time in my life, love what I see…well that is priceless to me. And for those who can’t see past the money or their opinions, they are missing out on watching someone they love transforming into the person they have always dreamed of being.

4 weeks post-op

Wow, I can't believe yesterday was the 1-month anniversary of my surgery. In ways it seems like it was just yesterday, and in others it seems like ages ago. Kind of like having kids!

The best news I have to share is that my hematoma no longer needs to be drained. Yay! It's all "softened up" so it will absorb on its own now. I am still a little more swollen in that area, but it no longer hurts any more than the rest of me.

Dr. Stephens also told me that I need to shed the compression garment. :-( He said it's fine to wear it, but that I don't need it, and it would be good to let my skin breathe a bit. However it's really become a sort of security blanket for me. It keeps everything all sucked in, helps me stand up straight, and the pressure is kind of like a 24/7 hug. It is a little difficult to get clothes over it, but I can hide it pretty well with layers. But, sadly, I know I can't wear it forever.

So today I spent most of the day in my Spanx rather than the compression garment. The Spanx is the next step down to wearing nothing but my clothes. Ugh, it felt awful. I feel all bloated now, and very sore. But I guess I need to make the transition. I think I know how Kaylyn must have felt giving up her bottle for a sippy cup! Pretty soon it will be going from sippy cup to a real cup. Baby steps!

I've also been dealing with a cold the past few days. I've got that stupid, dry, never-goes-away cough. I can tell now it's going to hit my chest and my sinuses HARD. Just hoping I can make it without a trip to the doctor.   

Although I won't have any post-op appointments for another month, I will still try to update my progress every week or so. :-)

i'm so excited, and i just can't hide it

I am FINALLY going to post an "after" picture. I kept putting this off because I was hoping the hematoma on my right side would go down, but it looks like the swelling is here to stay for a bit. And overall I am still REALLY swollen, so this is not my "final result" at all.

I don't own a bikini, so I took a tankini that I had and just tucked it up a bit. My belly button is still swollen and healing, but that will look better in a few months.

Ugh...and I know I still haven't posted a before shot. I just don't want to...it's so yucky. :-(

 

Ok, since my sister says I should...here is a before picture. YUCK!!!